Just one of those ordinary dilemmas - nothing heavy.
Yesterday I discovered that Peter Ould is going to lecture at St John's 12.00 Thurs. I thought it would be interesting and so arranged with another independent college student to go. (I looked at Peter Ould's website over Lambeth and read his reactions to Gene Robinson. I'm unsure about what to make of Peter Ould and I have my concerns about the ex-gay movement (True Freedom Trust etc) as you will discover from this blog under 'Issues in Human Sexuality' heading. I have a few questions for Peter Ould! I was even dreaming about asking him those questions last night. I digress...)
On arriving home last night, past the 'give 24 hrs notice to your dentist' cut-off, I realised it would clash with my 12.00 dental appointment. This morning I rang them. My husband advised I tell them I had a poorly child; he means well you know, so don't reflect on this as indicative of an untrustworthy character. He left for work and I was left with this idea floating in front of me. I thought about it on the school run and back but then thought while making my morning cup of tea - 'I can't do it - no - I'm going to tell the truth.' I thought mainly about Nicky Gumbel's story of the Christian who refused to lie for his boss, and say he was unavailable to take a phonecall, and how if he could lie for his boss, he could lie to his boss. Would his boss really be happy employing someone he couldn't trust? I thought about how surely I would only be living a shallow Christianity if I can lie to my dentist. So I told her I have a college lecture at that time. She siays she has to charge me £37!! This is the fee for missed appointments. Ahh! Telling the truth IS costly! So I told her I'd like 20 mins to think about it.
Here's what I'm thinking:
a) Pay £37 fine, it will cost me nearly that much anyway for the dental hygienist to do her work. I only saw the Dentist 2 weeks ago and she said my teeth were fine. She asked me at that appointment if I wanted to cancel my hygienist appointment? I should have said yes.
b) Go to dental hygienist and pay £30 for her teeth cleaning exploits but feel relieved that I haven't been fined and good that I am so careful about my teeth. But what about the resentment I will have to hide that I am missing the college lecture?
c) Should I even embroil myself again in thinking about 'Issues in Human Sexuality' - I didn't come to any conclusions properly during Lambeth even though I argued with myself back and forth.
d) I should go to this lecture and reflect on these things, I will understand more the nature of the stance required by the C of E for ordinands, after al,l to become a vicar you have to agree with Issues in Human Sexuality - this is something I might have to take a stance on.
If I don't go I will let down the person that I said I would meet from my course.
e) I just think too much - go and get a life, Rach!
What would you do?
I have 10 mins before I have to ring her back.
Update - I went!